benepla:

tastefullyoffensive:

(via davianavaka1)

walk into the party. almost every single guy has a purple cup. most of the girls have blue cups, but the purple cups are ONLY hitting up the girls with green cups (who range from “in a bitter breakup” to “i have a crush on my yoga instructor”). you walk into the backyard and there’s two people screamfighting with pink cups while a purple cup dude bolts past you and back into the party, zipping up. you put arsenic in a green cup and chug it in front of everyone and then they cheer and you don’t remember the last part because youre dead now so i guess ur relationship status is indeed complicated