pervocracy:

I may have mentioned this before, but I have a weird obsession with reading bureaucratic PDFs.  Sometimes because they describe an interesting or sinister reality behind the itemized-and-regulated calm, sometimes just because it’s my thing. Here’s some random ones I’ve been enjoying lately:

Requirements for flower displays used in the Olympics – “The species cannot be associated with any sadness or death message in any country or culture”

Behavioral profiles of orcas at Sea World – “Please be advised that this whale was involved in the accidental drowning of a trainer at Sealand of the Pacific in 1991 and involved in an incident with a guest in his pool at 1999 at SWF.”

(”involved in an incident” is highly euphemistic; the guest was found dead with orca tooth marks all over him)

Contract for appearing on “The Bachelorette” – “Such hidden cameras, if any, shall not be positioned to intentionally capture images of you urinating or defecating in the bathroom”

“Inmate Religious Beliefs And Practices” – An attempt by the Federal Bureau Of Prisons to describe the major religions of the world to prison officials.  Very long, somewhat disorganized, but filled with the fascinating tension that comes from someone sincerely trying to explain holy rituals to a person whose job is keeping humans in cages.