I just lost 3 followers. Was it the pumpkin fucking? I tagged it nsfw what more do you want from me? Was I supposed to NOT reblog a gif of a guy fucking a pumpkin? It’s Halloween. Grow up
it really pisses me off how people who are good at maths/science/history/etc are seen as the intelligent ones and will go far in life but also seen as the “boring” ones, but writers and artistic/creative people are seen as the interesting and talented ones but also unintelligent and doomed to be unsuccessful like shit bro how the fuck do any of us win
dungeons and dragons always has great stuff. there’s a jug that you can use to create 2 gallons of mayonnaise at will, like it’s actually written in the dungeon masters guide can you believe that
things my party and i have received in the course of our campaign:
a rock of gravity detection. you hold it out and release it. if it falls, gravity is working.
a wand of magic missiles…and polymorph. i can hit anything i shoot at, but i’ll also turn into a random creature. i’ve been an alligator, an octopus, and a tiny demon so far.
a cloak of tongues. sounds like you’d learn random languages, yeah? NOPE, THINK AGAIN SUCKER. you get to taste anything for like 30 yards around. our halfling informed us we all taste gross.
2 different rings of invisibility–one makes me invisible, but only to myself. the other makes me marginally stealthier, but also makes me absolutely convinced that i’m completely invisible.
the thespian mask of duality. two personalities become mortal enemies within the wearer. the effect is permanent.
and finally, the shield of protection. when you use it in combat, it will use your body to shield itself from harm.
whenever i see a baby in public i wish i were like a powerful faerie god mother character who could give the baby a gift like “you’ll never get a cold” or “math will always make sense to you” or something like bein’ great with string instruments but I don’t have any powers that I know of but it doesn’t stop me from trying so every time I see a baby in public I tell the adult with it “what a beautiful baby” and it makes them smile and then I pretend I can take the goodness of their smile and I look at the baby and I think very hard “you will have a good life, even if it’s hard, you will end up happy” and I’m just hopin’ the magic kicks in at some point
faerie: for your service, I will grant you one boon
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