The San Francisco Examiner, March 27, 1942
Category: Uncategorized
Why are you always wearing black?
The signs + their answer:
“To mourn myself”: Leo, Sagittarius, Libra, Aquarius
“To prepare for your funeral”: Aries, Taurus, Scorpio, Capricorn
“I’m a ninja, don’t tell anyone”: Virgo, Cancer, Pisces, Gemini
I saw an opportunity and I took it
This is what they mean when they say life flashes before your eyes as you die
For those wondering, the song is ”Mr. Blue Sky” by ELO.
Perhaps someone beat me to it, but here are ALL of the featured vines, in order of appearance:
- I won’t hesitate bitch
- Hi my name is Tre and I have a basketball game tomorrow
- Whaddup, I’m Jared I’m 19 and I never fucking learned how 2 read
- Kermit the Frog jumps off building
- Fr e sh a voca do
- back at it again at Krispy Kreme
- There is only one thing worse than a rapist
- Club Jam (yes a really good book)
- At least the taco was free
- I am the Sand Guardian, guardian of the sand
- Grandma loves ping pong too much
- If your name is Junior
- Welcome to Target
- I’m just cooking pizza
- Cole Sprouse dress-up game
- On all levels except physical, I am a Wolf
- Kid hits ceiling of gym with rope (breaking free)
- Kid smacked by fly swatter
- Fuck it up Kenneth (my boy going to school)
- Um I’m not finished (Tyler the Creator)
- WE’RE BREAKING FREE
- SAIL
- I’m Squidward
- So I’m sitting there, barbecue sauce on my tiddies
- So no head? (breaking skateboard)
- Actually, Megan (I can’t sit anywhere)
- No off topic questions (Chris Christie)
- What the fuck, Richard
- Drop it like it’s hot (its just luke)
- Bored as shiiiiii
- Liberian accent (plasma globe)
- New haircut (Parker Kit Hill)
- Summertime sadness (chicken)
- More like hurricane TORTILLA
- I got an a-bor-tion
- All Around the World (TheJasminator)
- When there’s a cutie next to you at a red light
- Snake licks lollipop
- Accept yourself, love yourself
- Be whatever you wanna be
- Don’t touch Zac’s music (LENARR)
- Whoever threw that paper, your mom’s a ho
- Can I please get a waffle?
- Turn off the flash you fucking moron (Star Wars)
- Ebony Jenkins (shut up!)
- Kevin, watch the light dude
- Horse meditation
- A girl a dream & a clothing hanger
- Is that a weed? (911 microwave)
- Helium balloons (floating car)
- Fireplace fairy
- I’m your freestyle dance teacher
- I can’t believe you’ve done this
- Which way the Quiznos is
- Impossible paper toss shot
- Hemtube (dancing with cat)
- I nurture my skin (Shaq)
- Why are you running
- Happy birthday?
- Thicker than a bowl of oatmeal (courtroom)
- Farkle falling
- Fuck you (soda machine)
- Squash banana (the branch I was holding broke)
- Take On Me
- And now my sock is wet (water gun)
- All I ever wanted was some motherfuckin guala
- When there’s too much drama at school
- Two bros chillin in the Hot Tub
- What’s your name? (ouija board)
- Chillary Clinton (chillin in Cedar Rapids)
- Guy drops slurpee (7-Eleven)
- Girl scared of convertible car
- Guy who is self-conscious about his lisp (Rice Krispies Treats)
- Would you like the spider on your hand?
- Shopping cart crash
- We actually have the chip reader now
- I’M A GIRAFFE
- Dinner with Zayn Malik (Chihuahua eating spaghetti)
I HOPE IT’S HELPFUL TO SOMEONE! Peace ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
this gave me such a warm feeling i legit teared up no joke
BEAUTY
THIS WAS BACK IN 2014 IM SCREAMING
and suddenly frogs
me & mutuals
getting a note on a super old post
You’re not cute as you think when you post sexual comments on your favs social media.
You’re not cute as you think when you call your favs daddy on their social media.
You’re not cute or as funny as you think you are tagging your favs in posts that are sexual, stalkerish, extremely personal or something you should probably talk to a professional about.
You’re not as cute as you think you are following your favs around or stalking them.
Your favs aren’t your SO. They don’t belong to you. They are allowed to date, see, fuck, style, how ever they want.
They aren’t your fucking doll and I don’t care how much of their shit you buy or see.
You’re not cute, funny, a dedicated fan.
You’re gross. Get out of your delusion box now.




![zubat: [dog voice] oof](https://66.media.tumblr.com/36f0dc01b8597ebe96faba7f750e8c7a/tumblr_inline_p7g9ilz9rY1qf2dlx_540.gif)