The story of the Distant Goddess is absolute proof that it’s a crime that Ancient Egyptian mythology hasn’t entered the popular conciousness in the same way as Greek stuff.
Short, super paraphrased version: Ra is sick of humanity being rebellious wee bastards, so he sends a goddess as an embodiment of his vengeance, usually Sekhmet in the form of a great fuckoff lion – first to the southern deserts to wipe out the followers of Set. She does so, and then for unspecified reasons, Ra decides maybe humanity is redeemable hey call off the murderlion. But being an embodiment of pure divine retribution, she isn’t really having it.
So Ra sends Thoth out in an effort to soothe the goddess before she arrives in the north and wipes out everything including the gods (she’s just that strong). He’s terrified, but he tries all sorts of cunning and wisdom and trickery and tells her moral tales and all that, but all he can do is delay her.
In the meantime, Ra’s priests of the north are hard at work. They brew thousands of barrels of beer, and mix pots and pots red dye. And when the goddess inevitably arrives, they mix it up and pour it into the reeds of the nile. Believing it to be the spilled blood of her enemies, she drinks it up proudly… And gets EXTREMELY drunk, calming down and transforming into Hathor, goddess of joy and love.
And once a year to celebrate this momentous occasion, Egyptians would get Absolutely Plastered.
I didn’t find details on the exact date, but some cross-googling suggests the festival occured around the start of the Nile flood season, which is in mid-July.
Anyone got a more precise date?
Well, the traditional beginning of the flood season varies from year to year based on the first rise of the star Sirius before sunrise, and also marks the beginning of the ancient Egyptian new year. The Festival of Drunkenness would be held about 20 days after that.
Sirius’ rise – which varies around the world based on longitude, but basing it on Egypt for consistency’s sake – happens on the 24th of July in 2018.
So if you want to get smashed on behalf of an angry cat, the 13th of August is the day to mark down.
Today’s the day fuckers, get smashed on behalf of a cat.
ok but why is ‘potato’ always used negatively in phrases? ‘couch potato’ and ‘he looks like a potato’……… what the hell have potatoes ever done to you? potatos are the mvps of the food world, the backbone of many dishes. they never let u down. potatoes are the real winners here and we should feel honoured to be described as one
I can think of at least one time potatoes have let down a very large group of people.
That was not the potatoes’ faults! That, like most things, was on the British.
What she means: Selena Qunitanilla single handedly smashed the patriarchy of tenjano music by becoming the highest selling artist in a male dominated music genre, won a Grammy, started her own clothing line of Latin inspired designs and patterns, this woman was a trend setter in fashion, music, dance, and was the light of so many people’s lives and if she were still alive today she would be no doubt one of the most iconic singers/fashion designers of our era. In fact, she was so iconic during her lifetime, that the state of Texas continues to observe her birthday as “Selena Day”, her biopic staring Jennifer Lopez continues to play every year around that time, and there’s a Selena museum dedicated to her life, displaying her most iconic garments she wore during her many performances. She made her family proud, she made the Latino community proud, Chorpus Christi proud, shit she makes me, a non Latina African American proud, she is an icon. An ICON. ICONIC.
this show is a fascinating mix of lovable weirdos and absolutely insufferable motherfuckers
“i filled my house with fun walkways and enrichment for my ridiculous number of cats!”
“i made a goth dreamhouse and then gave it to one of my friends for free because she seemed to really like it and it makes me happy to know it’s in good hands”
“i’m just really into pink”
“i imported all my furniture and had it brought up via crane to my luxury penthouse, where i spent the whole time being really anxious about the possibility that the people doing all the work for me might scratch the floors”
“i’m making doomsday bunkers that i’ll never explicitly say are for when we nuke all the brown people but that’s definitely what they’re for”
it’s really something how many of the features were men doing some weird shit and their wives just having to deal with it
there were couples who would do things together (like the russians who painted a masonic lodge for twelve years or w/e), but iirc there were literally zero instances of a husband having to deal with his wife’s weird house preferences. single and widowed women did whatever they wanted, but married women only ever did weird house things with their husbands.
