cursedexe:

im-a-luigi-number-one:

yousureitsnottheplague:

technogodhead:

im-a-luigi-number-one:

Wahoo, hiya everyone! It’s-a me, Luigi!

Now, I need to-a talk about something serious. People are-a living their lives in a sad, sad way. They don’t think that they’re-a number one! They think they’re-a number-a one billion! Oh no!

So if you’re-a reading this, I want you to know that Luigi loves you very much. You’re-a gonna do some-a great things, you know! You? You number one! Live life to-a the fullest! You’re-a great, friend!

why am I genuinely happy that Luigi cares about me

Well I-a do! I care for you and-a everyone! You’re number one, my friend! You! Are! Number! Oneeeeeee!!!

anarchetypal:

so i’m currently working at a law firm and the other day one of the attorneys was talking to me and he mentioned that he’s “not very confrontational” and i was like you are?? a lawyer???

and he said “yeah but in court there are rules. i can argue with some shmuck in a suit in front of a judge no problem, but when i leave the courthouse and go home i’m not gonna argue with my wife about dinner. there are no rules in our kitchen. i would die.”

jindosh:

people who put video tutorials online for literally everything are the backbone of this society i would be nowhere without the comfort that whenever i don’t know how to do something painfully simple i can look it up like i bet i could look up ‘how to preheat the oven’ and there’d be endless videos and i never have to look like a complete idiot again. thank you all for saving my life 

sodomymcscurvylegs:

Remember in the 90′s where we went through a phase where all electronics had transparent casing?

image

Shit was WILD! I want this today! Fuck “rose gold” or whatever, give me a transparent smartphone so I can directly stare daggers at my dying battery with every software update!