Fun things that happened when I saw john mulaney live:
-immeadiately addressed the left side of the audience and told them he wouldn’t he able to turn and look at them during the show because he had slept on his neck wrong and would instead turn to us and bow-which he did multiple times
-told us that the theatre we were at (the orpheum in LA) was most definitely haunted and to please let him know if there was a ghost on stage with him
-a lady in the audience had a sign that said “marry me” and when john saw it he got very flustered and told the woman he didn’t want to and that he was sure she is “a very nice lady but…uh…I just really don’t want to”
-RAN off stage during a bit about street smarts to emphasize the joke. I mean the man SPRINTED
-when he mentioned Petunia everyone started clapping and cheering. John looked visibly annoyed, looked around in disbelief, and when the applause finally died down he shook his head and then very dejectedly whispered “every time” into the mic
The results are in for the first-ever NPR Turning the Tables readers’ poll, and they send a strong message to anyone fancying themselves a cultural justice warrior in 2018. It is this: check your intervention. The original list of 150 Greatest Albums Made By Women, assembled by a committee of nearly 50 NPR-affiliated women, sought to correct a historic bias against putting women’s stories, and their artistry, at the center of popular music history. Your votes and comments, which deeply modify and sometimes openly challenge that list, challenged us to recognize that no matter how justified the correction may be, in popular music — happily — no center ever holds.
Instead, music’s center shimmies and bops. Playing the game of lists and charts, we might serve music better with an animated version of the classic Venn diagram, in which circles overlap, obscure each other, and stay in motion. The queens of one era are the forgotten ancestors of another. Time can also amplify importance: Artists who found their places within loyal subcultures may eventually emerge as central figures in a generation’s story, their legacies tended by fans until they grow sturdier and more vibrant. That’s the one ruling principle in popular music — fans matter. You make history.
When people are born, they have a streak of hair the same color and texture as their soulmate’s natural hair. You are born with a blue streak that floats in the air, and no matter what you do you can’t get it to lay flat on your head.
For most people they found each other at a young age, kindergarten , DayCare and the like but you had always felt that your love would never come. Your hair was a nice soft dusty blonde, it was short with wavy bangs in the front, except for the streak. The blue streak stood up on end , almost floating and following the line of your head, it felt sharp and if you could lay it flat it would go down your shoulder to your back, and while some found it cool or interesting it was a constant reminder that no one with the kind of hair would ever exist. You are now 17 you finished your junior year of highschool and had started working at that same job you always did, selling ice cream at a small shop on the main street of town. Customers always felt the same. The same woman who’s childs ice cream was not to his standards, the same guy who would try flavours but never actually buy anything and the same kid who tried his best to get a free cone. It was constantly the same, until you saw him. His Green emerald eyes looked up at you , and you could not help but get lost in them , his blue spiked hair seemed to poof up and curve behind his head and yes, he had a streak of dusty blonde hair, and he spoke with a voice anyone would trust “WOAH, THIS ICE CREAM STAND WOULDN’T HAPPEN TO SELL CHILLI DOGS WOULD IT?” before you could answer the boy looks over his shoulder with a look of content and valor and spoke again “WELL, MAYBE NEXT TIME RIGHT NOW ITS TIME TO TAKE DOWN EGGMANS ROBOTS AND GET THAT CHAOS EMERALD, CATCH YOU ON THE FLIP” and that beautiful blue hedgehog was gone in a flash.
more on writing muslim characters from a hijabi muslim girl
– hijabis get really excited over pretty scarves – they also like to collect pins and brooches – we get asked a lot of questions and it can be annoying or it can be amusing, just depends on our mood and personality and how the question is phrased – common questions include: – “not even water?” (referring to fasting) – hijabis hear a lot of “do you sleep in that?” (we don’t) and “where is your hair?” (in a bun or a braid, usually) – “is it mooze-slim or mozzlem?” (the answer is neither, it’s muslim, with a soft s and accent on the first syllable) – “ee-slam or iz-lamb?” (it’s iss-laam, accent on the first syllable) – “hee-job?” (heh-jahb, accent on the second syllable)
– “kor-an?” (no. quran. say it like koor-annn, accent on the second syllable) – people tend to mess up our names really badly and you just get a sigh and a resigned nod or an awkward smile, maybe a nickname instead – long hair is easy to hide, short hair is harder to wrap up – hijab isn’t just covering hair, it’s also showing as little skin as possible with the exception of face, hands, and feet, and not wearing tight/sheer clothing – that applies to men too, people just don’t like to mention it ( i wonder why) – henna/mehendi isn’t just for special occasions, you’ll see people wearing it for fun – henna/mehendi isn’t just for muslims, either, it’s not a religious thing – henna/mehendi is not just for women, men also wear it, especially on their weddings – there are big mehendi parties in the couple of nights before eid where people (usually just women and kids) gather and do each other’s mehendi, usually just hands and feet – five daily prayers – most muslim kids can stutter through a couple verses of quran in the original arabic text by the age of seven or eight, it does not matter where they live or where they’re from or what language they speak natively – muslim families tend to have multiple copies of the quran – there are no “versions” of the quran, there has only ever been one. all muslims follow the exact same book – muslims have no concept of taking God’s name in vain, we call on God at every little inconvenience – don’t use islamic phrases if you don’t know what they mean or how to use them. we use them often, inside and outside of religious settings. in islam, it is encouraged to mention God often and we say these things very casually, but we take them very seriously – Allahu Akbar means “God is Greatest” (often said when something shocks or surprises us, or if we’re scared or daunted, or when something amazing happens, whether it be good or bad; it’s like saying “oh my god”) – Subhan Allah means “Glory be to God” (i say subhan Allah at the sky, at babies, at trees, whatever strikes me as pleasant, especially if it’s in nature) – Bismillah means “in the name of God” and it’s just something you say before you start something like eating or doing your homework – In Shaa Allah means “if God wills” (example: you’ll be famous, in shaa Allah) (it’s a reminder that the future is in God’s hands, so be humble and be hopeful)
– Astaghfirullah means “i seek forgiveness from Allah” and it’s like “god forgive me” – Alhamdulillah means “all thanks and praise belong to God” and it’s just a little bit more serious than saying “thank god” (example: i passed my exams, alhamdulillah; i made it home okay, alhamdulillah) – when i say we use them casually, i really mean it – teacher forgot to assign homework? Alhamdulillah – our version of “amen” is “ameen” – muslims greet each other with “assalamu alaikum” which just means “peace be on you” and it’s like saying hi – the proper response is “walaikum assalam” which means “and on you be peace” and it’s like saying “you too”
