Who wants to guess how many bags of peaches are in my dad’s freezer?
The answer is:
Too fucking many
This is gonna make … a lot of jam …….
So, I managed to fit all but one big bowl of peaches into the two stock pots …
An hour and a half later, here they are simmering away …
How long is it gonna take to reduce them to jam, you ask?? Fuck if I know at this size lmao
In case you were wondering, it is, in fact, longer than 5 hours, as I am still stirring this jam over the oven 🙂 🙂 🙂
Oh and also there was another large bowl of peaches in the other fridge that I did not see until later, so I did not in fact fit ALL the peaches into the stock pots
On a brighter note, the whole house smells like a Victorian Christmas dinner
Hello again friends, it is currently REAL JAMMING TIME and I have been in stirring hell for seven hours
Went through two whole containers of pectin and a bunch of cornstarch already and things are looking just PEACHY
So, uh, the first stock pot alone yielded 272 ounces, so I … may have accidentally made about 68 8oz jars of jam …… and I only had 36 jars …
Guess I’m going back to the store tomorrow … and going to have to join the local farmers market to sell them …
Anyway, TEN CONTINUOUS HOURS OF WORK LATER, here I am at around 3am sealing my first batch of jars … (entire other stock pot of jam lurks ominously in the background)
God, it’s like when you overestimate how much pasta you’re gonna end up with, only 300% worse
So I woke up today after sleeping like a log to fibd my dad had already gone back to the store (which is like 30 min away) and gotten me more jars because he saw that I needed them
As you can see one of those pachages is the wrong size jar (4oz) so we’ll see if I can fit all the jam into these suckers (plus the two 8oz ones I had leftover)
My dad also put all the jars of jam in the fridge, although since they were all properly sealed (aw yeah) was totally unnecessary lol
He said he accidentally dropped one on the way to the fridge but I checked and it amazingly A) didn’t break, and B) remained properly sealed, so hats off to Ball corp, and also me I guess
Update: WE BE JAMMIN’
Spices I used for this recipe:
-Cinnamon
-Nutmeg
-Ginger
-Allspice
-Vanilla Extract
The combination worked out very well!
Gotta can the rest of it after I eat tho 😛
So, I FINALLY managed to can all the jam, except for like … 6 oz of it, so I made shortbread cookies to use that with 😉
Altogether I did end up with 72 jars of jam, 12 of which are the 4oz size though. What the fuck am I gonna do with all this jam, jesus christ
Anyway, thanks for coming to my jam-filled TED talk guys, take care
can everyone plz wish my parents a safe flight tomorrow morning to the isle of man cos my dad’s ban from visiting the island has been lifted finally after 40 all cos he fired a bottle rocket at the queen of england when he was a teenager
since i’ve gotten some intrigued asks here’s the story:
when my dad was 15 he went with his scout troop to a scouting jamboree on the isle of man where he and his friends decided to set off bottle rockets in the park cos idk they were dumb boys. and one of the bottle rockets went careening off into the road where it exploded right beside a car
now, in what year was my dad 15? 1977. the queen of england’s silver jubilee year. and what was the car my dad’s bottle rocket hit? the queen’s car in the cavalcade during her jubilee visit to the isle of man
throw in the fact my dad is irish and the 70s were the height of the troubles between the republic and britain and WHAM BAM THANK YA MAM! my dad got hit with a lifelong ban from ever visiting the isle of man and he and the whole scout troop were sent home
idk who decided to let him off for good behaviour after 40 years but when he got the letter in 2017 saying he could visit the isle of man again after jan 1 2018, my dad burst into the room on my stepmom and i and announced, “WE’RE GOING TO THE CHANNEL ISLANDS!”
shout out to the anon who just messaged me “that means somewhere out in the multiverse there’s a universe where your dad murdered the queen of england” which i’m never posting and just keeping in my inbox forever thank you that’s lovely and yes that’s exactly the response i wanted this to get
rip tumblr 