mamalaz:

bauliya:

mamalaz:

whoopace-kosi:

mamalaz:

mamalaz:

Avengers AU – If Tony was Peter’s biological father

Tony is super protective of his son. And Peter, inspired by his dad, becomes Spiderman anyway (his dad and his Uncle Rhodey figure him out in a second though).

My other Avengers AUs

Just wanted to add:

image

hate to be That Guy but who’s gonna put the Infinity War gif in ????

now add the umbrella scene for all the sadness you’ve caused me

What are your different body part canons for Spidey? (Tread lightly 😂)

my boi! (I will tread all the lightly)

Headcanon: peter immediately becomes the child of all the avengers. some are his cool uncle (tchalla, clint, thor), others are the vodka aunt (natasha, all the guardians), others are his new mom (bruce), and tony his dad, duh. but, he alwasy, always is loyal to aunt may first. if anything happened to her, he would rush to her aid in a heart beat, avengers be damned.

Heartcanon: he feeds all the strays whether it’s cats, dogs, rabbits. any stray, he feeds it.

Gutcanon: he always has change on him to give to the homeless in queens. or food, or something.

Junkcanon: he and shuri are always making dumb videos of peter’s (only peter’s) experiments failing. the comedy behind it drives them to be the most subscribed channel on youtube. (peter is a child y’all)

Spleencanon: he knows that all the older human avengers have seen the movies he mentions (star wars, alien), but he asks in the way he does cause he loves seeing tony’s reaction

tipsy-tripsee:

osterfields:

y’all: peter was able to stop bucky’s fist in civil war bc bucky heard peter’s voice, realized he was a child, then weakened his punch bc he was so worried about hurting a child uwu

me, eating pistachios: y’all know peter can canonically lift up to 75 tons, right. y’all know bucky’s fist is easy as hell for peter to block, right. y’all know bucky didn’t know shit about peter being a child and was just shocked that someone was able to so easily block his punch, right. y’all know that, right.

naw fuck that bucky’s punches aren’t easy to block, it’s WAY funnier if peter blocked a full force punch from bucky, who only a few seconds later realizes he’s a kid as soon as peter opens his mouth

that’s the face of a man who went from “holy shit he blocked my punch?” to holY SHiT a 12 YEARoLD BLOCKED mY PUNCH???” in 3 seconds flat.

its-me-connor:

one-piece-of-harry:

tomjusttom:

dreshdae:

one-piece-of-harry:

putmymusiconshuffleidareyou:

putmymusiconshuffleidareyou:

one-piece-of-harry:

The real reason it’s a fucking travesty Peter Parker is “straight” is that he would have a fucking field day making gay jokes. Imagine Spiderman wit mixed with millennial gay humour. He’d be unstoppable

[Criminal, or Steve. Or someone] give it to me straight. Why is some kid swinging around and beating up people in Queens?

[Peter] First of all, nothing I do is straight.

[Villain punches him]

[Peter] this is homophobia.

[Someone. Probably Tony] he said nothing about gay people, though?

[Peter] but he hit me. So again. Homophobia.

[Tony] you could not have picked a worse time to come out of the closet.

[Peter] bold of you to assume I was ever in the closet to begin with. I’ve been giving off Chaotic Twink Energy my whole damn life.

Aunt may: so why can’t you get your driver’s license again??

Peter: I’m???? Gay????

This is why we only allow grown-ups to write movie scripts

What if I told you…this whole post was just friends joking around…and not an actual submission for a Spiderman script…you fucking walnut

You heard the Walnuts, guys. We aren’t allowed to have fun anymore.

Scenes I need…

marvelousbirthdays:

bella-dahlia:

ifprongswerearavenclaw:

wheezeocheeseo:

jcp1765:

divide-by-triple-zero:

tygermama:

shetanshadowwolf:

lyricfrost13:

polymauk:

fangirlfreakingout:

runnerfivestillalive:

artemxmendacium:

Peter Parker: -on meeting Loki, offers his hand- Hi, I’m Peter!

Loki: -shakes his hand- Loki of Asgard.

Peter: Aren’t you like…a bad guy?

Loki: It varies from moment to moment.

Peter: So like…on a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst evil imaginable, like…killing puppies, and one being I’ll spit on your hotdog…where are you right now?

Loki: …maybe a three?

Peter: Cool. Lemme know if it gets above a six.

Loki: -thinking- I like him.

It had been a joke, a flippant line, but somehow, Loki found himself taking the youth up on it.

It was hard living around these heroic Avengers, hard trying to stay close to Thor. And when he felt his need for mischief rise too high, when he felt exasperation with these Midgardians turn too close to spite, he would casually say “Six.” to the young man, or sometimes “Seven.”

And Peter would spend the rest of his day with Loki. He would badger him with questions about magic, or drag him across his beloved city to see its entertainments, or take him along stopping petty crimes. He grounded Loki to the here and now, and distracted him from the churning, jagged shards of ice in his mind.

WE NEED LOKI AND PETER FICS

Stark’s brat had a system. It had been amusing, at first glance, especially when “killing puppies” was apparently a higher level of evil than trying to take over the world. It had risen and fallen – two, five, one. There were honestly good days.

It took some time before a truly bad day came up.

After a difficult battle, the Captain was being particularly sanctimonious, his team following suit. Even Stark made biting comments.

Loki could scream.

“Spider-man,” he said as calmly as he could. The young man glanced up, having been tying up some of their enemies a few yards away.

“Seven.”

“… okay, guys, I’m going to head out with Loki for the rest of the day. Don’t need us for debrief, yeah?”

“Sure,” Stark shrugged, glancing between the two of them oddly. Loki wasn’t entirely sure what the plan was. They went in civilian clothes to a small café.

“I wasn’t paying attention, so whatever was said, I don’t agree,” Peter began. “But that’s not what I’m here for. So. When you teleport, how does that work? Is it harder with longer distances? Or is knowledge of the place more helpful?” Loki blinked, but explained. It led to a discussion of magical theory. Peter (Loki still called him Parker aloud, but the child and even his young friends grew on him in time) was eager and curious, comparing what he knew from Strange and fantasy books to Loki’s knowledge. It was admittedly fascinating to see how many versions of sorcery humans had created by mere imagination. He was definitely amused by the elves and dwarves of Lord of the Rings.

Sometimes Peter tentatively asked about Strange and Maximoff, if they were doing similar things. Never if Loki was at an 8 or above though.

“Strange is like a child prodigy. He’s good, picks the practical parts up well. He even got the jump on me – but he has not had as much time to study as me. He’s a student where I am a master. Maximoff is incredibly powerful and incredibly lucky, but she does not have much training at all.” Sometimes conversation turned to music, animals, current events.

Peter was good. It was odd, how Loki became so sure of the fact so quickly.

After the conversations, often accompanied with food or a walk, he was always down to a 3 or so. Which made Peter an important person.

So the next time Peter was in trouble and the Avengers were indisposed, Loki was not the least bit surprised that he was not the only one ready to tear someone apart for the kid. Two men in red – one with horns, one with guns and swords – a young girl with cat-shaped blasters on her hands, and the Captain’s assassin friend. Loki curled his lips and muttered:

“For anyone that harms you? 10.”

IT GOT MORE SINCE THE LAST TIME I SAW IT AND IM IN LOVE

also, the fact we get Daredevil, Deadpool, Shuri, and James teaming up with Loki to protect Peter? I AM HERE FOR ALL THIS HELLS YES

(I thought I didn’t have anything to add but I do)

It was just after noon on a Saturday when Loki got a text from Peter, all it said was 

‘8, I’m at home′

Peter had never used their number system for himself before.

Loki had promised the boy’s aunt he would not teleport into their home and while he’d had every intention of honouring that promise, this was definitely an exception.

When Loki materialized in Peter’s room, his friend was pacing, angry and red-faced. Loki had never seen Peter furious before.

Peter began shouting when he saw Loki, ‘Men are scum! Irredeemable, horrible, crappy, scummy scum!’

‘Thank you for telling me, Peter.’ Loki said, sitting down on Peter’s bed. ‘Any particular men inspiring this diatribe?’

Peter grabbed a pillow off his bed and screamed into it, ‘There’s a guy at Aunt May’s work who’s harassing her and she says I need to stay out of it and let Human Resources do their jobs and he’s a creep and he’s making May feel creeped out and… I don’t know what to do.’

Loki blinked. Of all the people Peter could have gone to, he had chose Loki.

‘Thank you, for telling me this. Although I’m not sure how I can be of help.’

Peter flopped down onto the bed next to Loki, ‘You’re my friend and you’re an adult. And I wasn’t sure who else to talk to.’

Loki flopped back next to Peter, it seemed appropriate. ‘If Human Resources doesn’t sort this out to your satisfaction, I can turn this person into a goat.’

Peter giggled, ‘An ugly, stupid goat?’

‘Any kind of goat you like,’ Loki replied.

this is suddenly the most important thing in the world and i want to personally hug everyone in this thread.

I’m gonna cry I love this so so much thank you

yES

Omg my freaking heart

“I did not send for you, Parker. I am not feeling particularly murderous.”

Peter stood in the threshold of Loki’s quarters, both hands gripping the one arm of his backpack, twisting the padded nylon anxiously. The god of mischief hadn’t been responding to his texts for days, and finally he had pestered Thor into clueing him in.

Loki sat on the floor of his quarters, his pale skin marred by his bloodshot eyes rimmed red. A pile of books circled him, a moat of words keeping others at bay. He refused to look up at Peter, so the teenager squatted down in front of him.

“I know—you’re sad,” Peter said simply.

Loki snorted. “Sad. I am not sad; sad is a weak excuse of an emotion, a school child distraught in a moment’s inconvenience. Sad is—“

“—my parents are dead too, y’know,” Peter cut in. This made the Asgardian look up finally. “Or, maybe you don’t, I guess I don’t talk about it much. They died when I was young.”

Loki seemed caught off guard by the admission. “I… did not know that,” he said. “I suppose I never did ask.”

Peter sat down properly, bringing his knees up and looping his arms loosely around them, mirroring Loki’s position. “I don’t have a lot of memories of my parents. Not, like, specific ones—they all sort of blob together into this big hazy warm fuzzy feeling. But I remember once, when I was real sick, like, vomiting pea soup like the Exorcist sick, my Mom stayed home from work for three days to take care of me. She let me watch Alien for the first time, but I had to promise not to tell Dad, cause he thought I’d be too scared.” Peter let his chin rest on one of his knees, his gaze becoming unfocused and a hint of a melancholy smile gracing his lips. “She’s why I like movies so much, she loved ‘em.”

There was a moment of silence, though not an unpleasant one. Loki slowly unfolded his limbs, sitting cross legged and relaxing his shoulders. “My mother taught me my magic,” he finally said softly. “She tried to teach me her patience, but, alas, it didn’t take.”

Peter’s smile grew warmer. “Did she do that Mom voice whenever she caught you playing tricks on Thor, that whole ‘Ohh, Loki!’ in a totally not surprised, wants to be disappointed but is actually pretty entertained by it sort of way?”

Finally, the god of mischief cracked a smile. “Constantly.”

This is fabulous but now I want Loki/Aunt May somebody stop me halp

Scenes I need…

vaspider:

thoughtsfromthewindowsill:

fangirlfreakingout:

runnerfivestillalive:

artemxmendacium:

Peter Parker: -on meeting Loki, offers his hand- Hi, I’m Peter!

Loki: -shakes his hand- Loki of Asgard.

Peter: Aren’t you like…a bad guy?

Loki: It varies from moment to moment.

Peter: So like…on a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst evil imaginable, like…killing puppies, and one being I’ll spit on your hotdog…where are you right now?

Loki: …maybe a three?

Peter: Cool. Lemme know if it gets above a six.

Loki: -thinking- I like him.

It had been a joke, a flippant line, but somehow, Loki found himself taking the youth up on it.

It was hard living around these heroic Avengers, hard trying to stay close to Thor. And when he felt his need for mischief rise too high, when he felt exasperation with these Midgardians turn too close to spite, he would casually say “Six.” to the young man, or sometimes “Seven.”

And Peter would spend the rest of his day with Loki. He would badger him with questions about magic, or drag him across his beloved city to see its entertainments, or take him along stopping petty crimes. He grounded Loki to the here and now, and distracted him from the churning, jagged shards of ice in his mind.

WE NEED LOKI AND PETER FICS

Yeah, the people who write the comics agree with you

“go back to philly where you came from” omg