professional-bandaid-slinger:

southernsideofme:

This gives me unnecessary amounts of anxiety

mjalti:

Literally anyone romantically interested in me: you are the most unique, funny, genuine person I’ve ever spoken to, I was hoping we could—

my brain, immediately:

mynamebatman:

blueelectricangels:

pervocracy:

are you ready for my favorite fact?

If you leave a hamster wheel out in the forest, wild mice will come and run on it.

that is my favorite fact

Bobcats and lynx will sit in cardboard boxes abandoned in the middle of the forest.

I asked the lynx researcher who told me this why, and he said “Cats, man” and shrugged.

This is now an “if I fits, I sits” appreciation thread.

slimy:

mjalti:

only sexy bitches sit on kitchen counters that’s the law

salty-blue-mage:

if-only-angels-could-prevail:

if-only-angels-could-prevail:

dasha-loses-it:

c-bassmeow:

Gay people from 1950-2010: we are human just like you, we’re not another species or a subculture, the only difference is that we are attracted to the same gender.

Gay people in 2018: straight people are stinky, WIG!

straight people ARE stinky

wig!

pressxtodavid:

joey-wheeler-official:

joey-wheeler-official:

gettin real tired of people pretending that the writers not explaining every little thing in detail is the same thing as a plothole tbh

has to think once while watching something whoa this is bad writing

The Cinema Sins effect

firedrill:

doctor: sir, i’m sorry. the results are in and i’m afraid you have updog

patient: wh- what’s updog

doctor, calling a nurse on the hospital’s intercom: KAREN GET IN HERE I TOLD YOU I COULD DO IT

georgetheblob:

Tonight I have something to offer that’s not art…it’s a lovely story. The story of the worst thing I have ever taken part in creating.

So!! Back at the beginning of the second semester of AP Calculus we were taking our first quiz on intergrals, and my teacher told us that he wanted to see the big “S” on our quiz or else we wouldn’t get credit.

Now, by big “S” of course he meant the integral symbol, like this:

But the integral symbol is not the first thing my gremlin brain thinks of when I hear “the big S” and then I got a horrible idea, which I then proceeded to draw and show to my Calc teacher…

It has been dubbed the Cursed Integral by my class and my teacher hates it with all of his being

sknjob:

top reasons to get married

1. Firmly saying “That’s my wife!” and knock someone out in one punch
2. love i guess

ayyvpd:

me .01 seconds after emphatically saying yes to plans